New Year’s Resolution?

As the calendar turns to a New Year, it’s a natural time to resolve to start over, to make changes that need to be made, hence, the ritual of New Year’s resolutions. Commitments to improve health by exercise or weight loss are probably the most popular resolutions, but if you have come to this site, you’ve probably considered making a commitment to control your anger better.

But then again, it may seem frightening to commit to such, because past efforts at anger management have always failed. If that describes you—or if you’ve never tried to overcome anger before—I have a couple of words of advice.

Quit trying to not be angry. That’s negative thinking and it doesn’t work anyway. This isn’t permission to let it all out. You still need to hold in angry words and actions. However, instead of focusing on not being angry, commit yourself to love those around you. Learn to love.

Love is:

• Patient
• Kind
• Not Jealous
• Does Not Brag
• Not Jealous
• Doesn’t seek its own way or advantage
• Not provoked
• Doesn’t keep track of wrongs suffered
• Doesn’t rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth
• Bears all things
• Believes all things
• Hopes all things
• Endures all things
• Love Never fails (From 1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

If you can learn to relate to others with these character qualities, you won’t have a problem with anger.

Second, realize that this type of love is too hard for you—and ask God to love through you. As long as you try hard to walk in love, you’ll keep having to try hard to make it happen. However, if you cry out to God to love through you and to fill your heart with love, He will transform your heart. It’ll probably be a slow process, so pray the prayer every morning and throughout the day. God is love. If He lives in your heart, His love resides in your heart too. As you surrender to Him, His love will grow. As love increases, anger will decrease.

For lack of wood a fire goes out

For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, contention quiets it down.

Merry Christmas!

Have a very Merry Christmas, filled with love, laughter, and sharing meaningful fellowship with those you love. Most of all, have an Emmanuel Christmas—one blessed with an awareness of Christ’s presence with you.

Indeed, He promised that He will never leave or forsake those who love Him and are called by His name. May He open your eyes and heart to experience His nearness.

Never write a letter

People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.

When a wise man has a controversy with a foolish man

When a wise man has a controversy with a foolish man, the foolish man either rages or laughs and there is no rest.

How to Fight Christmas Stress

Christmas is celebrated as the season of happiness and joy. However, for many, it’s also the most stressful time of the year. When stress builds, you’re one step away from lashing out at innocent people around you. But Christmas joy doesn’t have to be ruined with tension-induced anger. There are some simple steps that can help us dial down and find grace for each day.

When stress builds:

• Ask God for help. When stressed, we sometimes forget to cry out to God. His strength is made known in our weakness. He can calm our hearts and help us cope.

• Be grateful. What has God done for you? Be specific. As you count your blessings your focus moves from the negative—how bad things are, or how much you have to do—to the positive things in your life. Remembering what God has done builds faith for what He can do in the present situation.

• Identify stress issues. What is causing the stress? One thing, or too many things to do? Are the things on your list all necessary? Many Christmas activities come from trying to keep up with our peers or serve tradition. Some could be eliminated without harm. Do away with what you can. Cry out to the Lord for help with the rest.

• Spend within your means. If financially stressed, don’t go in debt for gifts—that adds more stress which will stay with you. Instead, seek God for creative ways to give of yourself. Make it a Christmas of building relationships with those you love.

Books and magazines offer more practical suggestions, but many times, our real need is to refocus and line our priorities up with what God is asking of us rather than what cultural or personal expectations demand. Just knowing we are pleasing the Lord brings satisfaction and renewed energy, and having His strength and grace for the task can carry us through the most stressful days.

There is nothing more galling

There is nothing more galling to angry people than the coolness of those on whom they wish to vent their spleen.